Embarrassing Moments

Embarrassing moments - I'm sure that most of you have been there and done that. Your face gets red, your hands are sweat and you'd really, really like to be somewhere else. Remember the Southwest Airlines' "Do you want to get away" commercials? Yep, that's what it's like. But there are different degrees of embarrassing moments - all the way from a "giggle with your sister/best friend/hubby" to "Ohmigod, just shoot me now." I came up with this topic because I recently had one of those "giggle" moments.

Last week I went to the mall to get my hair cut, and on the way in and out I had to walk through Nordstrom's (notice the words "had to"). And since I was already in Nordstrom's I decided to check out the shoes. For you folks who aren't familiar with the tony department store I'll set the stage. Think a smidge below Neimann's and Sak's but add a guy in a tux playing a grand piano. It's not exactly your run of the mill big box store. As for the clerks - let's just say they could go straight from work to high tea without going home to change.

The concierge summoned a sale's associate who insisted on measuring my foot. I've been wearing shoes for a long time, but hey, if that made her day I was fair game. She was having a hard time deciding on the number - was it an 8 or an 8 1/2 - so she turned over the shoe I'd taken off (supposedly looking for a number) and right there like a neon sign was a Marshall's tag with $29.99 written in 36 point font. I'm surprised they didn't give me the boot (pun intended) right there and then.

Here's an "Ohmigod" moment from my teen years. It was a Saturday afternoon and I was babysitting my bratty brother. I was bored out of my mind so I decided to do a spa day. My hair was rolled in orange juice cans (for you folks without curly hair that's a hair straightening technique). I had cotton balls between my toes and for the piece de resistance I had applied some goopy red face mask that cracked when it dried. Cute, huh? Everything was copasetic, that is until I heard my brother at the front door. Guess what? It wasn't my bro. In fact, standing at the door was a boy that I'd had a crush on forever. One look at me and he was in his car and outta there so fast he fishtailed down the road. Nope, he never asked me out. I wonder why?

And here's another family story that should give you the chuckles. To say my father-in-law was eccentric is an understatement of mammoth proportions. In retrospect this story is funny, but it wasn't at all amusing to my husband who was in junior high at the time - you know what it's like to be thirteen. The family car overheated so his dad pullled into the a gas station. They way my husband tells it, the attendant (and yeah, a long time ago there were people who actually pumped your gas) disappeared under the hood and then came around to the driver's side window and uttered these fateful words, "Hey man, did you know you have coffee perkin' out of that radiator?" Seems my pop-in-law heard that coffee grounds could be used to clean a radiator. Oh, boy!

So now that you know our secrets hop in and tell us your story. But keep in mind that someday you might see it in a book.

BTW - Top Gun Dad comes out this week.

Ann DeFee
Top Gun Dad, HAR, October 2009
Hill Country Hero, HAR, February 2010