Chicken Dressing Catfish

You've probably heard of the highly readable grammar book, Eats, Shoots & Leaves by Lynne Truss. As a writer in love with words and their relationships to one another, I devoured this book and I'm always on the lookout for writing samples that are ambiguous and unintentionally funny.

Alas, I often find them in my own work. I was going over the rough draft of a proposal the other day, and the first sentence of the first chapter read something like this: "Jane Selwyn's knees wobbled as she made her way across the parking lot toward the tallest office building in town wearing an expensive but slightly outdated suit." I had to stop and wonder: How did the building find a suit big enough to fit it? (This sentence is so hideous, not even punctuation could save it.)

Thank God for revision, especially the ever-popular delete button.

Oh, you're probably wondering about the headline. A few days ago I went out to dinner at a neighborhood café with my husband, who is also a writer. We saw "Chicken dressing catfish" on the chalkboard menu, and we both immediately received the same mental picture: a chicken putting a coat and scarf on a catfish. (Turns out a bit of punctuation went missing from that menu.) Neither of us could stop laughing, and we couldn't even explain to the waitress what was so funny. (You had to be there.)

Writers often collect these unintentionally funny phrases. (I have a list of hilarious newspaper headlines that I unearth once a year or so and laugh until I cry.) Do you have any grammatical, spelling or punctuation funnies you'd like to share? (Please withhold authors' names unless it's your own. We don't want to embarrass anyone!)