Okay, time to fess up. I bet there are some of you, like me, who use the holidays as an excuse to eat what you want and not worry about putting on those few extra pounds because, guess what? New Year's is right around the corner and so are those resolutions. The first on the list--lose five pounds. So breakout the eggnog, bake those cookies and make that fudge and don't you dare feel guilty--I'm not going to!
Dieter's Night Before Christmas
Author Unknown
‘Twas the night before Christmas and all round my hips
Were Fannie May candies that sneaked past my lips.
Fudge brownies were stored in the freezer with care
In hopes that my thighs would forget they were there.
While Mama in her girdle and I in chin straps
Had just settled down to sugar-borne naps.
When out in the pantry there arose such a clatter
I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the kitchen I flew like a flash,
Tore open the icebox then threw up the sash.
The marshmallow look of the new-fallen snow
Sent thoughts of a binge to my body below.
When what to my wandering eyes should appear
A marzipan Santa with eight chocolate reindeer!
That huge chunk of candy so luscious and slick
I knew in a second that I’d wind up sick.
The sweet-coated santa, those sugared reindeer
I closed my eyes tightly but still I could hear;
On Pritzker, on Stillman, on weak one, on TOPS
A Weight Watcher dropout from sugar detox.
From the top of the scales to the top of the hall
Now dash away pounds now dash away all.
Dressed up in Lane Bryant from my head to nightdress
My clothes were all bulging from too much excess.
My droll little mouth and my round little belly,
They shook when I laughed like a bowl full of jelly.
I spoke not a word but went straight to my work
Ate all of the candy then turned with a jerk.
And laying a finger beside my heartburn
Gave a quick nod toward the bedroom I turned.
I eased into bed, to the heavens I cry–
If temptation’s removed I’ll get thin by and by.
And I mumbled again as I turned for the night
In the morning I’ll starve… ’til I take that first bite!
Merry Christmas and best wishes for a safe, happy, and healthy New Year!
Marin
*Hearts of Appalachia*
For the Children Oct 07
In A Soldier's Arms Feb 08
A Coal Miner's Wife Aug 08
www.marinthomas.com
Merry Christmas and best wishes for a safe, happy, and healthy New Year!
Marin
*Hearts of Appalachia*
For the Children Oct 07
In A Soldier's Arms Feb 08
A Coal Miner's Wife Aug 08
www.marinthomas.com
6 comments:
Boy is that poem appropriate for me.
That's me, too. LOL! But this year, I'm trying to have SOME control.
LOL. That was great and so true. Oh well, that's what New Year resolutions are for, right?
The cover of your new book is great... which it was summer!
Estella, Jennifer and Jennifer--glad to know I won't be suffering sugar withdrawl alone after the holidays :-)
Lily--Thanks for the kudo's on my Feb cover--wish I could take credit but all I did was mention a picnic scene on the art-fact form and the art department did the rest :-)
We're expecting more rain, sleet and snow in Chicago this weekend so I have a couple of American Romances ready to read if we become stranded inside.
Happy Holidays
Marin
www.marinthomas.com
I try not to diet during the holidays!
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