Dave and Church and Cell Phone Services

So, there we were, standing in our pew last night for Maundy Thursday services, listening to the pastor, when well, my son’s cell phone started singing. Yep, instead of having an annoying ringtone like mine, Dave Matthews sings a few bars every time Arthur gets a text.

I should probably back up a little bit and give y’all some background information. First, to my family’s dismay, I’m a front-of-the-church gal. If we sit in one of the back pews, I find myself looking around becoming distracted, so we almost always sit front and center in the third row. Also, I have never been especially nice to people who don’t turn off their cell phones in church, movies, theaters, you name it.

My kids know this. My son was ‘sure’ he’d turned off his phone. I can’t remember a time he hasn’t turned off his phone. Well, except for last night. But there it went-Right when the whole congregation was standing, respectful and silent. Right in the middle of communion.

Oops.

In a flash I went from concentrating on the service to worrying about what to do. Yep, within seconds I went straight into Mom Mode. The church was quiet. Our pastor began to speak. Dave Mathews had just made an appearance. I was not happy.

As soon as the choir began to sing, I whispered, “Turn. That. Phone. Off.” I wasn’t sweet about it, either. Has anyone else perfected that perfect Mom Order…used only in dire emergencies…the kind that your kids know NEVER to disobey? That was me last night.

My son swallowed. As the organ played, he whispered right back. “I can’t, Mom. If I turn it off the music will go off again.”

Oops!

Right as the choir sings the last chorus, off goes ‘Crash’ again. With one hand in his pocket, Art opens and shuts his phone. Dave Matthews stops. My daughter starts giggling. My son, who hasn’t blushed since he was well, 8, is beet red.

People are giving me that look. That same look that I usually give to people who can’t settle down. I’m now red, too. Talk about bad timing! This is terrible!

As the whole room drifted back to silent as our Pastor spoke again. I realize Yikes! We’re stuck! I can’t tell my son to leave. Nobody can leave! Now all I’m thinking about is ‘please no one text my kid during the next two minutes.’

Right as another prayer starts, Art somehow manages to pop out the battery with one hand. Hooray! The phone situation is finally taken care off. But, by now we’re all sweaty. Yes, my 16 year old’s problem has now become my problem. The stress of doing exactly the wrong thing at exactly the wrong time has gotten to me.

Finally we get to sit down and the service continues. But the whole situation has taken a life of its own. Every so often, my kids and I whisper. The one thing we all agree on was that it was good my husband was out of town. “Dad would have been so mad,” my son says. “Dad would have taken that phone,” my daughter proclaimed. I know they’re both right. So I made an executive decision. “We just won’t tell him about it.”

The church service ends. Everyone around us is teasing us, teasing my son. Now that the panic is over, I’m thinking the ‘cell phone service’ was a good thing to happen. So often, I forget that accidents happen, and sometimes things just don’t go as planned. Either I can be upset and worry, or settle down and just go with the flow. This was one of those times.

After the service, the three of us walk out to the parking lot. We’re relieved. We still can’t believe Dave managed to sing right at the absolute worst time. Talk about an intense church service!

Then, my son starts laughing. “I just found out who texted me. It was Dad. He was wondering what I was doing. When I didn’t answer, he kept trying. You know how you and Dad get when we don’t answer our phones.”

I know. I also know how mad I get when they don’t turn off phones at church. Now I also remember that sometimes accidents happen, but it’s okay. I still got my teenagers to go with me to church on a Thursday night. We still managed to laugh about an embarrassing situation.

And, well, now we have a good story. Something fun to share in a...blog. I’ll take that!

Happy Easter!
Shelley